“If this global warming keeps up I’m gonna start charging you rent for that stool,” Tony said to me as I grabbed the one next to him.
“Christ, Tony. It’s another three digit day.”
I nodded to Marty. “Bring me something artisanal,” I said.
“An Old Style okay?” she said.
“As long as it’s cold. Perfect.”
“Topic?” Tony said.
“No. Nothing. I’m heading downtown Wednesday morning for a rally at CPS. Supporting the teachers union. Wanna come?”
“Think I’m busy,” said Tony.
“At 9 in the morning? Doing what?”
“Got a meeting here at the Red Line. With Marty and a cold one.”
“Right,” I said.
“I read in your blog that some Brit newspaper said the whole world is counting on the Chicago teachers to win this and kick some Rahm butt,” said Tony.
“Yes. Though I don’t think they put it so poetically.”
“That kind of reminds me of my dead Aunt Frances.”
“Of course it does. Go ahead. Tell me how an article in The Guardian newspaper in England about the international importance of the Chicago teachers negotiations with Mayor Emanuel reminds you of your dead Aunt Frances.”
“When I was a kid my Aunt Frances did two things that pissed me off. Whenever she came over she would always claim she had left something in the car and could I go get it. Always. And she would hand me the keys and I would have to go find her big ass silver Crown Victoria and go get whatever it was she had left behind for me to get.”
“Well, that sounds really horrible,” I said without much noticeable sympathy in my voice. “And what was the second thing that your dead Aunt Frances did that pissed you off?”
“She always said we.”
“We?”
“Yeh. Like we think this and we went there. When she really meant I. Like she was speaking on behalf of everybody.”
“The royal we,” I said.
“But my dead Aunt Frances was definitely no royalty,” said Tony. “So I’m kind of thinking that Brit newspaper is laying a heavy load on Chicago teachers. I mean they’re not negotiating a contract on behalf of everybody in the world.”
“I think they mean that unions have been taking it on the chin for a while and that things here could start to turn it around.”
“Sure. Sure,” said Tony. “But like that bumper sticker says. Think globally but negotiate locally.”
“Act locally,” I said.
“Right,” said Tony. “And don’t leave nothing in the car.”
Fred Klonsky 